Wednesday

what i wanted to be when i grow up


zebrahorsebunnyhand

Tuesday

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Just a little annoyed.

Monday

If you don't know, you should know.


this man.

....and more.


floating





How do you know?


Us


I would see this high.



Just so you know, this isn't real. It's art...which kind of makes it real.



He's....surprised.


read....carefully.


new addition to my panda family

Saturday

Learn from me.

How to tick people off...



1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."

4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."

8. Practice making fax and modem noises.

9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.

10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.

13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.

17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.

18. Honk and wave to strangers.

19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.

20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

21. type only in lowercase.

22. dont use any punctuation either

23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."


25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin.
When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

27. Ask people what gender they are.

28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

30. Sing along at the opera.

31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles.

Wednesday

Music and its origins within us

I know that whenever people hear music, eventually, they fall in love with one particular melody from a particular song by a particular artist. We don't know why we love that one piece... we cannot explain why something one can love, another can loathe. All I can do, is present a theory; rationalize a sensical explanation that may only be viable in my own mind.

When I look around me and to try to comprehend the reasons why I find some things to be more beautiful than others, I always hear a song. Whenever I lay on sand at the beach and look out at the wide, mysterious ocean, I hear a song; a different song every time but nonetheless... there's always a faint melody floating above that moment. Whenever I think of my mother and how she would play with my hair for hours because she loved the way it felt against her fingertips, there was a song playing. Every time I see the man I love, there's a song playing, always a faint, hovering melody. A different one every time.

I have come to think that it's how our our minds were built. The music we are meant to listen to is in our bones.